random thoughts... random musings... the stuff of which life is made

ogbuefi has a new home!!!

2005-07-07T18:58:00.000-04:00

hey!
so, the greatest apologies to anyone and everyone who actually read this thing when it was regularly updated. i have been a bad, bad blogger. :(
but, there is hope and the outlook is looking good for my new blog, which can ostensibly be found here: http://ogbuefiblog.blogspot.com/
i really do hope you go and check it out. it will be totally different, (hopefully a lot better!) and will mostly be poetry and writings of mine. no more political rantings and random ramblings (though you will have to excuse any relapses on my part. :) )
so, it's been great, but hey, it's gonna get even better!

so, for my final post, i offer you a haiku:

this blog kinda sucked
my next one will be better
and more poetic (than this)

love and peace in the middle east,
ogbuefi stephi

resurrection

2005-05-27T18:01:00.000-04:00

ok wow, so i haven't been a very good blogger as of recently. too busy studying and listening to some darn good music to keep up with this silly thing, which i suspect no one really reads anyway. but it's so nice to put ideas out there... i just couldn't stay away. :)

anyway... so i've decided i don't really like the format as it is... and i've been thinking about revamping it. making it really focused and more professional looking. not that it matters, because no one even reads it! but for my personal satisfaction and peace of mind, the blog will be changing really soon.

i want to make it more focused... less random rambling. more philosophical musings. and POETRY!!! stuff i'm writing/thinking about. that type of thing. and cool things i'd like to share.

look for it, it's coming!

more community discourse

2005-05-08T13:28:00.000-04:00

so, it took me longer to get to posting this than i thought it would. but, well, better late than never.
here's the rest of the dialogue between my friend ed (who, as of 5/5/05, has definitely left school and endeavored to join a commune) and me (who opposes the idea, simply because i believe a good education is the most basic requirement and necessary foundation for an informed and active citizen). enjoy it!

~o.s.

Ed,
Your email sparked something in my subconscious about what I want out of life. Although I won't go as far as to drop out of school and join a commune (I'm sadly not that brave), I certainly share your views on society.
However, I think that if you have a problem with the way things are working, you should strive to change them, not just remove yourself from the problem. Although it would be remarkable to experience this alternative way of life that a commune would seem to provide, I think that the rewards would only be temporary. The life you would live in a commune would only be rewarding because of its contrast with the life you lived in the mainstream. Does this make sense?
I just feel that it's the prevailing idea of what life should be that needs to be changed, and that won't happen if those who possess the energy and concern abandon the majority. Change needs to happen within the system to affect the system. Imagine that society as a whole is like an obstinate child. You can threaten punishment or offer him/her rewards if s/he will do what you say. But really the only way to inspire change (not just temporary change, but lasting change) is through internalization. Intrinsic motivation, as opposed to extrinsic motivation. Change from within, not from without.
But then, perhaps my knowledge regarding communes is just not as expansive as yours. But after all, this is just my opinion.
~Stephanie Lee

stephanie- i dont consider my dropping out as giving up on social justice issues, at all. like i said, there are very strong involved activist groups within these communes which work on "outside" problems, donate to charity, go to rallies and conferences and give lectures and hold workshops educating people on alternative forms of society. and each person dropping out weakens power structures that control society...you don't support corporations that exploit you, you dont use oil that fuels wars disguised as something else, and you pay little taxes to your government who prefers to spend most of it by dropping bombs on other countries that happen to have lots of oil. and i disagree with your point that "he life you would live in a commune would only be rewarding because of its contrast with the life you lived in the mainstream". studies have shown again and again that it's our personal relationships and jobs that determine our lasting happiness. communes offer both of these, and in great quantities. a close-knit, spiritual, friendly community in which you get to try out various kinds of work over your life, which is usually not seen as a chore by those on the commune. and i dont think that joining a commune is necessarily a brave act. im fleeing from a somewhat useless degree in a shaky job market and economy, the pressure of forced, institutionalized education, from the huge debt i'd have if i stuck with college... it's much less daunting for me to leave. what is so hard in making a 3-week visit, or stopping by for a 3-hour tour? these are welcoming and understanding people.
imagine Society as a rich greedy short-sighted white man who will stop at nothing to make a profit off of whatever he can until he can't breathe the air or drink the water anymore. Or until nuclear weapons are coming towards him and he hits the button as well. I think his corruption runs too deep, and he's too stuck in his ways, to try and change him; he knows that cash money is what he wants and that's what he'll get.And imagine the commune movement as a young child who is open-minded and considerate of the world around him, and just needs some support to grow and become a great force for change....Ed

Ed,
I understand your stance, and I most definitely respect it. I did not mean to imply that opting to live in a commune was a cop-out. I mean, recognizing the need for change and then acting on it (whether through detachment or engagement) is better than blindly, complacently accepting the temporary illusions proffered to us in society. I certainly didn't mean for you to feel that I thought you were "giving up on social justice issues." Rather, I feel that you are giving up on American society. And although I agree with many parts of your last email, I still consider this abandonment of society to be quite unfortunate. As Nathaniel elucidated, "People can and do live within society and make a positive change."I see the merits of your choice, however. As Justin's comment helped me realize, even individual actions, though miniscule and seemingly insignificant in relation to the larger whole, can make a world of difference.
Thanks for the discourse! It's been fun,
Stephanie Lee

ok steph...joining a commune doesn't mean "giving up on American society" or "abandoning" society. that would be more like moving to another country. rather it is a way to reform society. i consider it as living within society too...communes buy and sell commodities with the larger society, pay taxes, vote...you are very engaged, educating people about and promoting an alternative way of living, and working on all kinds of social justice issues... "working actively for reform" to put it in Nate's terms. i think i have already stated the influences i don't like in this life path I'm on right now, and have made it clear as to how I'm "working to change and counter those influences"... by not buying all types of shit i dont need thats being shoved in my face at every turn. by living in a way that makes sense, and is sustainable. by being a little candle out in the country and i hope few people interpreted/fabricated my sentiments as being hostile, disrespectful, or derogatory towards those that do choose to follow a more traditional or common way of living. i think Western is full of incredible people that really do care about the way we live, and who really will make a difference and accomplish great things, even in the throes of traditional society. i don't think it was implicit at all in my listservs that i think "those of us who choose to stay at Western and Miami are somehow less ethical or enlightened than you". and you are not necesarily "playing into the system" or being a "tool of the system" if you don't join a commune. you are even if you are on the commune; it's just easier to resist the societal pressures and requirements to consume all kinds of stuff. I'm aware that for some people, a commune is not really an option, for whatever reason. And i feel like there were responses that went uneducated as to what the term "intentional communities" can mean. this can be anything from a two families that choose to live in the same house, or a group that you go eat dinner with after work every day, or some type of co-housing group of people living near each other, or just a co-op setup. "commune" is more reserved for places such as Twin Oaks, where you pretty much live and work there all the time. so there is a whole mix of opportunities available. there are communities in urban areas just as much as there are rural communities. and many of the"commune", rural,m Twin Oaks type of communities do accept families. and, of course, people who want to do something "productive with their lives". in fact i would consider just about all community folk as doing just that. another website for the less commune-interested but sustainability-conscious folks: http://www.simplyliving.org/

ok Ed (and others to whom this may apply)...
I'm sorry if my emails offended you. I really didn't mean to attack your ideas or goals. I really respect you for actually taking action and for striving to instigate change. I think the idea of change, regardless of form, method, motive, whatever, is more appealing than blind acceptance. Obviously, societal ideals are flawed. And although I support your method of "'working to change and counter those influences'... by not buying all types of shit i dont need thats being shoved in my face at every turn," I will venture a guess that this type of action can be taken by anyone, anywhere. So, although a commune may make it easier for you to deny your consumer urges, it might not eliminate them entirely. And those who don't subscribe to the commune lifestyle aren't necessarily going to be blind, misinformed, compulsive consumers, completely lacking in self-control. I guessI echo Alex Dodwell's sentiment when he stated that he finds communes to be "too dependant of the mechanics of the same society they're trying to change."In the end, society can't be changed because the people will always be the same. Maybe this is a little grim, but aren't humans natural consumers? There's no way to avoid our consumer urges. Even in a commune, members will be consuming *something*. (In fact, I've heard that some communes actually use Mac computers,which are harmful to the environment. Lead, mercury and the like are released from mac's when they're disposed. See: http://www.computertakeback.com/bad_apple/bad_apple_biz.cfm)
Whether art, information, etc., everything traces back to something material that we must acquire. Even those things that transcend the material are found in something material. So, battling consumption now seems like a futile effort. But a battle that may nevertheless be incredibly rewarding.
Ed (and others), please don't take offense. It's just my opinion. Anyway, I thought you might like to know, Edward, that because of your insistence in defending the commune, I will at least attempt to visit one this summer or the next. After all, perhaps it will be a splendid, magical place...
~Stephanie Lee

community discourse

2005-04-05T16:47:00.000-04:00

well, my friend ed has decided to drop out of school.
now, i admit, i am often tempted to abandon this wearisome, disappointing, fast-paced life to consumption and corruption and general sell-out-ness. i often feel i am doomed to a life of work and money hungriness. i fear that my life will eventually give way to time and maturity, that i will lose sight and loyalty to the child within me, the innocence of youth and the carefree spirit and candidness of the not-caring-about-anything-but-the-present mindset that seems to become lost to the throes of consumer society.
i wish i could abandon these fruitless pursuits and become a revolutionary, spewing romantic poetry about truth and love. or a hermit and live in the woods, gazing soulfully at the stars at night and listening to birdsong in the early morning glow of the sun. or a crazy hobo on the corner of the street, draped in rags and caked in my own filth, making everyone around me uncomfortable, but content in my individual inconformity...
anything but the corporate cog i feel we are all fated to become.

communes and displeasure with society

2005-04-02T17:53:00.000-05:00

so my friend ed sends the following email out on one of the school's listserves today...
thought it was cool, so i thought i would share it.

Consider a community, I'm dropping out

I am going to visiting several intentional communities this summer,
expecting to become a member at one and live there for at least a few
years, if not for the rest of my life. I have been interesting in
communities since my senior year of high school, and after reading
several books and innumerous websites, I am convinced that such
communities are the solution and alternative to an environmentally and
spiritually destructive, competitive and violent society.
But every time I say I'm going to live in a commune, or intentional
community, people get all of these weird ideas in their head about what
a commune is. If you know very little about the contemporary community
movement (and it's not a coincidence they're not taught in school), I
suggest you check out a short article...
http://www.ic.org/pnp/myths.html
There are many types of communities, yet the ones I'm most considering
are progressive, rural, spiritual but with few traditional religious
followers, feminist, "ecovillages" (very environmentally conscious),
technologically modern (with computers, email and the like), income and
resource-sharing...Many communes such as Twin Oaks began around 1970,
are very stable and pragmatically designed. And if you care about more
than just improving your life, these communes have strong progressive
activist groups...this is not necessarily an escape from being involved
in issues you care about. You will likely become more involved with a
strong support group and more leisure time.
I consider such community living as one of the most
environmentally-conscious, spiritually fulfilling,
anti-capitalist/anti-consumerist, non-competitive, healthy and sane
ways
of living. My view is that, despite those with the best intentions,
life
after college will likely be competitive, stressful, alienating, and it
will be difficult to live without buying more shit than you need,
wasting more gas and natural resources, etc., basically perpetuating
an
insanely corrupt government and corporate-controlled society. No, on a
commune you are not completely exempt from playing a role in this
business, but taxes and wasteful consumption are at a minimum. The
efficiency of such widespread sharing of labor and materials is hard to
attain elsewhere. And of course, the more people in communes, the
weaker
the "system".
Communes such as Twin Oaks (www.twinoaks.org)and Acorn
(www.ic.org/acorn
...where fellow Western dropout Hannah Farrin lives), the type I'm
most interested in, usually have either a day-tour option or a
three-week visitor period, where you live on the commune. It is an
evaluation...you see if you like it, they see if they like you. Even if
you're not interested on living there or unsure, but would like to
check
it out, you can still do the three-week tour. Most communes welcome
temporary visitors who aren't planning to join. I highly suggest a
commune visit as a summer activity.
OK I'm about done rambling I expect you're interested or not, or still
uninformed, in which case you should email or talk to me or check out
the links below.
http://thefec.org/ ...The Federation of Egalitarian Communities. A good
place to start. I'm looking at Acorn, East Wind, and Twin Oaks.
http://gen.ecovillage.org/index.html The Global Ecovillage Network.
Sort of a broader scope than the FEC communities. You can search for
specific states and regions for communities, such as "USA East".
http://www.ic.org/ Intentional Communities. The largest database of
worldwide communities
I suggest looking at these (using ic.org directory): Dreamtime, Acorn,
Dancing Rabbit, Earth Haven Eco-Village, East Wind Community, Twin
Oaks.
OK here I'm just going to paste a footer from a commune email...Good
luck, feel free to ask me questions or borrow my book on Twin Oaks, "Is
it Utopia Yet?"....
The Federation of Egalitarian Communities
(community values include income-sharing, non-violence)
http://www.thefec.org
The Fellowship for Intentional Community
(a wide variety of community styles and values)
http://www.ic.org
The International Communes Desk
(kibbutzim and other forms of cooperative living)
http://www.communa.org.il
Queer in Community
(The intentional communities network for lesbians,
gays, bisexuals, transgendereds,queers, faeries,
dykes, and the people who love us)
http://www.ic.org/qic
The Feminist EcoVillage Project
(communities which value feminism and sustainability)
http://www.ic.org/eco
Vegan in Community
("vegan's eye view" of community living)
http://www.ic.org/vegan
communitymade.com
(online store which sells products made by people who
live in community)
http://www.communitymade.com
Living Routes
(a program that offers college credit to visit eco-villages)
http://www.livingroutes.org

radiohead and britney spears? in collaboration? surely you jest!

2005-04-01T16:36:00.000-05:00

well, much to my dismay (and surprise, actually), the pairing is not so bad. it's definitely one of the stranger ones to fathom, but hey, it seems that the result is not such a terrible thing.

new single, by radiohead with a little help from one mrs. britney spears federline:
"the king with shred legs"

look for it online!

catharsis

2005-03-29T21:20:00.000-05:00

i really need to write right now. this seems like a good enough outlet, so here we go...

i just got in a big over-the-phone fight with my parents. it's just so frustrating. i can't talk to them right now. usually when this happens i am just so wrought with guilt afterward that i call them up to apologize (i know right. who's the bigger person now? my parents would never even think to call me back to make up. they are so stubborn some times... and they fault me for my stubbornness. at least i don't pick petty fights!)

it was one of those nights that i am just so thankful the whole thing happened over the phone instead of face to face. i hate it. usually i would be so submissive and yield to their every little request or demand. not today. not that i'm proud. i'm actually quite unhappy and displeased with myself right now. but at least i didn't back down or relent this time.

so we argued about school. quite the common topic for scream fests in my family. asian parents will do that to you. and i'd like to think that for the most part it has helped me to become a very strong-willed and motivated person. for that i am thankful. but some times it just fills me with such intense self-loathing. i always come off as such an ass when i talk about grades around my friends. they give me all this crap because i keep talking about how i need to get a's and how a b isn't good enough.

well, i took my second com midterm today. and let me tell you... i think i bombed. "com shouldn't be hard," my mom says. i feel like she's right, but the way the tests are worded... oh man. i feel like the professor hasn't quite mastered the concept of using words to express ideas. he's not an intelligent man. and i'm not even being mean or vindictive. i'm not saying this out of spite. the man seriously doesn't know how to talk or write to communicate any sort of coherent idea. it's so frustrating to me, particularly since i am considering literature and linguistics as my focus area, with projected research project focusing on the psychology of language. i view words as a distillation of thought. i believe there's a perfect word for every thought and that there are definitely more effective means of communicating certain things than others. some words carry more meaningful weight and significance. other words are empty, hollow of meaning, used as filler. unnecessary.

so i get this shmuck's exam, and all of the questions are so emptily assembled with the most meaningless, random, poorly connected phrases just linked together. a lot of the chunks i recognize from readings and lectures, but it seems that he just spliced a bunch of his notes and pasted them together. it's not that the questions didn't make sense. it's that it took like five minutes to read and analyze each and every one to determine what exactly i thought he was asking!

the problem with me is i tend to over-think. i over-analyze sentences and syntactical structures. i can't help it. it's just the way i think. it's not that i'm dumb. i'm no frickin' genius, but i like to think my language skills are more advanced than most. so when i read these poorly written exams, i just feel drained and wasted. i could do fine if i could just write a summary of every idea. that might be more expedient even. because the way this is going, i'm going to fail and then have to go in to the retard's office and argue for every single point and point out where the exam confused me. it's really not my fault. anybody could have been confused out of their mind reading that thing.

i'm gonna have to school him in simple writing. and i think i'll start with seven types of ambiguity...

where'd my blog go?

2005-03-28T03:04:00.000-05:00

have i fallen into a blogosphere blackhole?

iWaste

2005-03-24T18:45:00.000-05:00

i found this amazing site today when browsing through blogs.
i think it's a great idea, so i thought i'd share it.

now, i'll admit. i bought into the whole iPod, iTunes scene (although i do not own a mac computer). and i love the thing, i really do. i mean, all my cds on one tiny little pocket sized machine? wonderful!

but, as always, consumption takes you to that bad place and then you realize what your horrible consumer behaviors are doing to the environment. and then you're sad.

but the truth is, most people are probably so enamored with the convenience of the iPod to care about the effects electronic waste will cause in the future. ever wonder where all that e-waste goes and what it does? most people don't, and that's the problem. we can't continue innovating and then not invent ways of recycling the past.

so check out http://www.computertakeback.com/bad_apple/bad_apple_biz.cfm and do something to make your displeasure known!

what if i died?

2005-03-18T18:30:00.000-05:00

...who would read my email?

i know that this seems like such an insipid question. and really, it is. i mean, how superficial of me, right? how absolutely inconsequential.

email. psssh. honestly.

but in all seriousness, if you think about it, email is a significant part of someone's life. no different than a diary or a journal. or a book of one's life as written by a team of authors. or a serial account of the events/thoughts/feelings that comprise a moment. one's life from a third person perspective. relationships distilled into words.

i was thinking more about the peculiarity of email correspondence the other day... it seems to me that email has become something of a record of many human relationships. if you think about it, a lot of people's communication takes place through some sort of medium. whereas years before letters were used for this purpose, email has now taken that place in modern communication. a lot of relationships are based on this type of back-and-forth.

but what if something happened to disrupt this communication? it's hard enough communicating in real-life... but there's a lot of miscommunication that could result in this sort of medium just from negligence... or unfortunate events.

so what would happen if someone suddenly passed away or became incapacitated, so that they could no longer read or write emails? what would happen to the email relationships they sustained? would their correspondences know? would their friends know? would there be any way for them to figure it out? or would they become upset, thinking that the said person was snubbing them? wouldn't that be tragic? like so many other human relationships, email correspondences are so fragile and susceptible to negligence and the slightest shift in dynamic.

i don't know if any of this even matters... it's just that i've been thinking a lot about it lately. i think it'd be terrible for all those emails to accumulate, without an audience. all those emotions that people had taken the time to put into words for someone to read... remaining unread. like the emotions had never been felt in the first place because they'd never been acted upon.

not that a deceased's unread emails should be published or anything. i just think it would be nice to have some sort of documentation of a life... in the way that emails would be able to show how a person lived, how they thought, what they felt, what mattered most to them, who and what and how they loved.

it's funny because you can talk to the relatives and friends of a deceased person and still you don't really get a real sense of the type of person they were other than through inference alone. and not that emails would provide anything more substantial, but they would provide a sense of personal voice. that's what i like about this idea: it's personal.

i would hate to think that if i died, my life would only be left to the small details and moments i shared with other people. memories are so easily altered and lost, and they are never really perceived the same way by different people. that's what makes memories so beautiful and fascinating... but also horribly inaccurate. emails are also susceptible to various interpretations, but at least they would be in the words of the writer, the perceiver, the one who lived the event.

i guess what i am trying to say is that i think it would be great if everyone had an email buddy. just someone who would inherit or be granted the rights to someone's email account, in the event that something happened. just so they could email the persons in the address book to let them know what happened or something. just to give closure to the relationships.

it's just that email correspondences are such beautiful, fragile relationships. wouldn't it be absolutely tragic to allow them to die with a person?

forthcoming post

2005-03-17T17:51:00.000-05:00

i have an idea...
don't go anywhere, i feel like it's a good one.
stay tuned.

see ya on the flipside.
~o.s.

who knew cultural priming started this early?

2005-03-16T18:21:00.000-05:00

who would have thought? well... not me, that's for sure.

read: OPERATION POCKET FULL OF WISHES
Anne Elizabeth Moore, In These Times
At American Girl Place, girls can pick dolls whose eye and
hair color and ethnic background match their own. Why not
go there and see if these young shoppers want more from
their role models than an array of outfits?
http://www.alternet.org/story/21508/

apparently, the things you never think about can hurt you in a big way. and people wonder why girls growing up in america have such unhealthy self-perceptions. well...

there's obviously more to the equation, but what once seemed an innocuous (american girl was once even touted to be a positive) influence is now proving to be just as profit-driven, brain-washing and exploitative as a regular ol' walmart.

for shame, american girl. all my childhood consumer fantasies were once in your manipulative hands. well, no longer. terrible. just terrible.

wal-mart is the devil. and this is why...

2005-03-14T10:52:00.000-05:00

just read an appaling article on alternet.com (a great source for left-wing news... an alternative to fox news and such. if you are interested in the state of labor, civil rights, or if you dislike bush and his policies, i recommend this as a source for news)
if you didn't hate wal-mart before, here's your new reason to:

WAL-MART à LA MEXICANA
John Ross, The Progressive
Wal-Mart puts down roots in the shadow of the Pyramid of the Sun in San Juan Teotihuacan. Is the global leviathan any match for Quetzalcoatl?
http://www.alternet.org/story/21398/

all right already we'll all float on...

2005-03-07T16:13:00.000-05:00

i found this on another blog (http://teachingtheindiekidstodanceagain.blogspot.com/). ostensibly amusing...
http://homepage.mac.com/sceldred/.Public/Steve/Kidz_Bop-Float_On.mp3
Kidz Bop usually produces cleaned-up versions of popular songs for children, with more subdued music and children singing the lyrics.
how they got a bunch of kids to chant about "backing up into a cop car" and "fake jamaicans taking every last dime with that scam" is beyond me. but i suppose in the end, all the kids will hear is "YEAH!"

am i alive?

2005-03-05T17:14:00.000-05:00

i have been so busy with school and projects that recently i have had been feeling so weird. let's see if i can put it into words or try to explain it...

sometimes, when i get bogged down with seemingly inconsequential things (ie school, work, tv, etc.), when i look back at it all, i wonder how i have been spending my time. like yesterday, i had spend something like two hours trying to write a paper, to no avail. then i fell asleep for something like an hour. then my friend alex came to visit me in my room. and as he was talking i was watching him. and i watched his mouth move, his lips forming the words, his tongue in accordance, his hands gesturing, his eyes wide with enthusiasm. we're good friends, but in that moment, he felt so alien, so strange. i don't know why.

then he asked me a question. i couldn't tell you what it was. i didn't think about it at all. and i asked him, "am i alive?" i didn't feel alive at the moment.

he gave me a weird look. and i knew when i said it it wouldn't make sense to him, but at that moment it did. and i explained to him that i didn't feel alive. not dead, mind you, but certainly not alive.

this happens once every month or so. i stop, think, then wonder. am i alive? because i certainly don't feel like i am sometimes.

mmm... tasty music!

2005-02-28T21:47:00.000-05:00

so i haven't done a post in an inexcusably long time. and i am sorry about that. so to make it up to any one who reads this on a regular enough basis, (and to make myself feel better), i will compensate herein...

i have been listening to the most amazing music lately. so good, i don't want to do anything but lie on the couch with a book, a cup of tea, and listen to music. loud, continuous, mellifluous music. oh sweet music. it really is quite the substitute for love.

a sampling of the stuff i've been listening to:

modest mouse (everything they've ever made is amazing! special soft spot for this is a long drive... though)
arcade fire's funeral (what a wonderful indie sensation. they make me so happiiiee!)
bright eyes' LIFTED, digital ash in a digital urn, i'm wide awake it's morning (getting more used to their unique sound... lyrics are amazing to listen to)
!!!'s louden up now (fun, trip-hoppy... still can't figure out how to say the name though.
kings of leon's youth and young manhood, aha shake heartbreak (love their sound and style)
the zutons' who killed the zutons (cool sax intermingled with british pop. definitely a unique sound)
the killers' hot fuss (although not my favorite group on this list, still worth a listen)
keane's hopes and fears (oh how i love this group. too bad (for me) that other people are catching on to how great they are)
the shins' chutes too narrow and oh, inverted world (fun sound! the o.c. is on the way to ruining them for me, though. blast! fox needs to die!!)
the postal service's give up and the district sleeps alone tonight (ah, yes.)
death cab for cutie's transatlanticism (how is it that this group is still relatively unknown?)

ah, and also this: i stumbled across this website (http://soldout.be/) the other day when i was searching for... i can't remember now, but i got so distracted by this site that it's not even important anymore. this band allows you to "remix" a version of one of their songs to create your own "original." a lot of fun, and pretty amusing, especially for someone like me who has never produced a real piece of music before (i play piano and violin pretty well, but somehow i fell that this is different).

anyway, check out the music.

it is quite fine.

life should be a musical

2005-02-05T19:50:00.000-05:00

went to see RENT for the first time today at cincinatti, at the aranoff.

really amazing and chilling. still working off that incredible high...

it's my belief that life would be more interesting and happier if all of life were a musical. then again, it could get really exhausting.

ah well. off to buy the soundtrack.

"the heat death of humanity"

2005-02-04T15:11:00.000-05:00

have i mentioned how much i adore alternet? what with its occasional quirkily written, but still insightful and informative articles, it's quite the ingestible alternative to the majority of right-wing spins on issues that typically pervade the media today.

today, check out the article on global warming, a term public officials are trying to obviate, replacing it with more innocuous phrases to downplay the gravity of our current environmental state. an excerpt from the article at http://www.alternet.org/envirohealth/21164/:

[the author of an esteemed book] favors use of the term "global warming" to identify the increase in greenhouse gases in the last half-century and the effect it has on the Earth's climate, over the term "climate change," with its more neutral, accepting tone. While the White House seems to hope that "climate variations" will become the lingua franca of the topic, we are pushing for something equally and oppositely dramatic like "climate destruction" or perhaps, "the heat death of humanity."

how's that for ya, rush limbaugh?

spike lee = disappointment of the day

2005-02-03T21:01:00.000-05:00

hello hello.

so spike lee came to miami today. yes, the spike lee of bamboozled and malcolm x fame graced tiny, unworthy oxford, ohio with his momentous presence today. as i am interested in film, and have an incurable fascination with celebrity (and its social consequences), and since spike lee is often heralded as one of the most influential african americans in cinema and music, i thought, "well, gee, what an incredible oppurtunity! i get to meet the genius in person!"

well, much to my dismay, what followed was one of the more disappointing moments in my young life. (watch out, loooong entry!)

first of all, the event took place in a question/answer format. and unfortunately, the majority of the questions were initially quite elementery and simple-minded (and somewhat egocentric, as the majority of people asking questions were doing so in the vain attempt to achieve some sort of acknowledgement or approval from mr. lee).

in the course of the approx. hour-long session, spike said a few things that made me cheer and laugh, some sentiments i echoed in my own heart. but he also said things that made me wince, made me furrow my brow in intellectual disapproval and disgust, comments that seemed counterintuitive, some that seemed too ingratiating and desperate themselves.

in the first category were his expoundings and analyses of current african american culture. par exemple, he ranted about a recent music video by the artist nelly, as an example of "gangsta rap" and its negative depictions of black women. he attacked nelly's recent "pimp juice" campaign, criticizing the current trend in black music culture to esteem "bling bling" and "pimped cars and rims" as signifiers of success and worth (he mentions the mtv show "pimp my ride" and fifty cent's album get rich or die trying as examples of this skewed mentality). and he complained about the popular and frequent depiction of blacks as "pimps, ho's, and bitches," adding remorsefully that young children (black and white alike) are becoming complacent with this imagery, and thus grow up to embody it. this i agreed with whole-heartedly. (cheering, echoing in heart)

in the latter, however, were a stream of contradictions and seemingly hypocritical statements (as well as non-statements, or failed attempts to answer questions). the most irksome argument spike lee made was in regards to his alleged (or as he proved today, real and quite actual) rivalry with quentin tarantino (qt). lee's stance was that tarantino's over-use of the n-word has been overlooked in society. in comparison, he offers the instance a couple of years ago when one of michael jackson's songs used the phrase "you can jew me, you can sue me; you can [...] me, you can chyke (sp?) me."

well, apparently, the use of the word "chyke" in the song was enough to cause a lot of trouble for jackson (accusations of anti-semitism obviously ensued). but lee argued that this type of negative response was also deserved in qt's case. lee's point seemed to be that "a racial slur is a racial slur," regardless of its type or context. i do agree with this. i see no need or artistic validation for the use of racial slurs. however, (and this is where spike lee really started to upset me) spike lee explicitly stated today that "quentin tarantino is no artist" (wincing). although lee is certainly entitled to his opinion, i think that as an artist, making such an unsupported, inflammatory claim was not only absurd and disrespectful, it was irresponsible.

it is my opinion that spike lee overstepped his bounds with his comment this afternoon. first, i believe he inferred too much about tarantino's artistic merit. art is, by definition, a subjective element, created by an artist to fulfill and communicate both a personal and societal role and message. i haven't actually seen any of qt's movies (and i hope this doesn't undermine my opinion or argument), but i'd like to think (and hope) that the use of the racial slur, however offensive and socially unacceptable it may have been, was included for some artistic reason.

furthermore, the actors involved in the particular scene to which lee was referring were african american (i believe lee said they were chris tucker and samuel l. jackson). i would like to think that if the film included the n-word for no justifiable purpose that the actors would have realized and either refused to play such a degrading part or have fought to have the script changed. i hope that such respectable actors as the ones lee mentioned would not prostitute themselves, their art, their craft, their race and community for a movie role.

the fact that michael jackson got in trouble for a racial slur, and quentin tarantino did not indicated to lee that "something is wrong." (intellectual furrowing.) lee seems to suggest that the difference in the degree of justice was due to color. this, if it were the case, would indeed be wrong. but i don't think that this is an instance of racial injustice.

i think that michael jackson deserved the criticism he received. it is incredibly offensive to the jewish members of his audience. all racial slurs are offensive. yes, the n-word is offensive. and tarantino definitely deserved criticism for the excessive use of such an inflammatory word. but regardless of whether one is criticized or chastized for the use of a racial slur, the mere use (or even mis-use) of an offensive word does not make an individual more or less of an artist. and this, sadly, seemed to be spike lee's point.

mr. lee, i think what is "wrong" here is not that the "right" people are not getting punished or reprimanded for using racial slurs in their mediums of expression. instead, it is the idea of the perpetuation of these ideas and offensive notions that these racial slurs have come to symbolize and embody. and how can i, as a member of non-black society, come to see your point and respect your opinion when you do nothing to justify your statements. the use of a racial slur does not necessarily make one a racist (as you seem to have suggested and used as a justification of your opinion that tarantino is "not an artist"). otherwise, i am sorry to say, the majority of the african american race would be racist against itself.

and doesn't this idea seem a bit hypocritical? you ream tarantino for using the n-word, call him a racist, state that this is why white adolescents "get beat up by big black guys:" because they watch his movies and then begin using it in their speech. all of this may be true. but i would venture to say that the real problem here, mr. lee, is that the n-word and other offensive words ("pimps, bitches, ho's" as you yourself identified) are still perpetuated by the very individuals and groups that these words have come to so offensively identify. you spoke of the need for change in film and music, to reflect a more progressive agenda for all elements of american culture. i suppose you hope for a halt to racism in particular. i could not be in further agreement. a society free from hatred and prejudice would be utopian. but change needs to start somewhere. i'd like to think that someone of your power and influence (as evidenced today by the quantities of your ingratiating admirers and fans) would be one of the first to make efforts to change and stimulate progress.

the problem, mr. lee, is that african americans themselves use the n-word. talk about racial injustice, how do you justify an african american using the n-word in reference to another african american, then condemn the white person who uses the word in their artistic medium, call them a "non-artist?" this seems counterintuitive and ridiculous. you want to see change? then act upon it.

as i watched spike lee, in his designer jeans and tight-fitting sweater, a cool denim cap pulled down almost over his eyes, his "ice" earring glistening in the spotlight, i filled with sadness and disappointment. a man seemingly filled with so much talent and wonderful ideas, and evident intelligence (the man is certainly no republican or conservative) was also being so hypocritical and over-critical of a peer without finding the faults within himself.

funny funny video

2005-02-01T15:32:00.000-05:00

hahaha.

hate FOX as much as i do? sickened by the actions of our current "president?" really enjoy watching un-intelligent public figures squirm when faced with the truth?

then check this out!!!

NEW FROM THE FIGHT FOX FILES:
Watch Fox News anchor Bridget Quinn lose her cool -- and her objectivity -- when confronted with a critiqueof the Bush Inauguration: http://www.alternet.org/fightfox/

geeez...

2005-01-31T21:59:00.000-05:00

HELLO! it is so good to be back!

so, after an embarassingly long hiatus, i resume my stream of random musings with this quote from jack london's iron heel:

"The cloth bulged with his muscles... His neck was the neck of a prize-fighter, thick and strong," London wrote. "So this was the social philosopher and ex-horseshoe my father had discovered, was my thought. And he certainly looked it with those bulging muscles and that bull-throat. Immediately I classified him -- a sort of prodigy, I thought, a Blind Tom of the working class."

i found this online (http://sunsetgun.typepad.com/strange_impersonation/2004/10/_i_heart_huckab.html)when searching for the release date for i heart huckabee's, a movie i have fallen in love with and have esteemed as the film with the originality and nuance that eternal sunshine of the spotless mind never managed to be (gosh, was that film diappointing... in my opinion, that is).

the quote just struck me, so i thought i had to share it.

as pointless and irrelevant as this may be in the grand scheme of things, that's all i have for now. more later (i hope). please do visit again!

how do i hate ky? oh... let me count the ways!

2004-12-30T14:24:00.000-05:00

so... i live in ky.
yeah. kentucky.

and i've realized, in the four months or so that i've been away at school that i am not very fond of my state. in fact, i hate it. and this is just me, but i've come to realize it's such a superficial, narrow-minded, neo-conservative crazy crop of lunatic, redneck confederates. (just look at the state's voting record: we voted for gosh darned effin' bush... twice! and we voted for issue one. yeah.)

i'm speaking in sweeping generalizations, of course. the whole state can't be that bad. but i live in one of the biggest urban cities in ky, and it's still over run with backwards, backwoods rednecks. i hate it here, which sucks, because my father works at the university and will probably have to for a good ten years or so more before he can finally retire and ship off to california (which i'm also not that fond of, but for different reasons. it can't be that bad, though. i mean... come on, at least they didn't vote for bush)

anyway, before i get too verbose and rant-y, a short list of why i hate it here, and then on to an amusing anecdote!...

so, i hate ky because:

it's an overwhelmingly red state
our state motto or slogan or whatever is "ky... where education pays." i mean, wtf? that makes as much sense as bush's "no child left behind" plan. if a school is doing shoddily, the state guts it and fires all the teachers. way to go!
confederate flags, license plates, t-shirts and other offensive paraphernalia abound
poor urban planning
uncontrollable suburban sprawl (the farms and wetlands around my home have been destroyed for cookie-cutter homes. the thought of it makes me violent and angry... i actually want to put people in a strangle-hold and berate them for their blatant lack of respect for the environment)
lack of awareness and social activism (and this may just be my inner liberal itching to get out, but no one in this forsaken state gives a flying f*** about doing anything to evoke change. and maybe they're all happy with the way things are going in the world, but how can anyone be so delusional? or am i just that disillusioned?)
the sight of the ever-growing shopping centers and ugly subdivisions
not a natural forested or wooded area in sight
wetlands gutted to make a duck pond and fountain... for a bank. WTF??!!
oh, did i mention rabid consumerism? the motto written on the inside of a shopping bag from the fayette mall: "who says you can't buy happiness?"... is that anywhere near a healthy mentality? i think not.
perhaps one of the most sickeningly... white places ever. now don't get me wrong, i am not being a racist. but you know something's wrong when you need to do a double-take when you see someone of color walking down the street. imagine the tv show 7th heaven and you have ky. yeah, makes you want to shoot yourself, doesn't it?

there's gotta be more, but i'm sure you've had enough now.

read this and be appalled

2004-12-11T17:12:00.000-05:00

"What should we do with US classics like Cat on a Hot Tin Roof or The Color Purple?
'Dig a hole,' Gerald Allen recommends, 'and dump them in it.'
Don't laugh. Gerald Allen's book-burying opinions are not a joke. "

yeah, that's right. the crazy rightist moral supremists and neo-conservative cultural nazis are now attacking "morally wrong" brilliants such as Tennessee Williams and Alice Walker.

read on if you dare:
http://www.guardian.co.uk/arts/features/story/0,11710,1369643,00.html?gusrc=rss

have a wonderful, "homosexual-free" day!

you know something's wrong when...

2004-12-10T16:00:00.000-05:00

you know something's wrong with our nation when people find it necessary to advertise patriotism...

so check out these laughable fallacies of logic that now represent the fascist ideal of our nation today...
---> http://www.cardhouse.com/travel/az/billboards/billboards.htm
---> http://www.bluelemur.com/index.php?p=442

and welcome the impending jingoism!

check this out! amazing!

2004-12-08T15:51:00.000-05:00

wow... this really puts all those big name pop stars and rappers to shame.

watch this totally amazing video from sarah mclachlan. she shows her fellow musicians and attendant consumers and lemmings of the music industry the ways in which the money that would otherwise be spent on a professionally-produced music video (or, money that would be wasted on a pointless, artless piece of insignificant flash-in-the-pan pop culture) could benefit hundreds upon thousands of fellow human beings all around the world.

so watch! ---> http://www.sarahmclachlan.com/ (**look for the "world on fire" video!**)

because it really makes you despise people like beyonce knowles who, in her "crazy in love" video, decided to torch and destroy a perfectly fine automobile (and what i would wager is a far better specimen of automotive vehicle than i will ever possess in my lifetime) ... and for what? for the sake of an artistic message? mmm... for some reason, i highly doubt it. amazing how sarah's sacrifice could carry so much social and artistic significance, while extravagance and waste, as in beyonce's example only leads to... well, more waste... of her time and money, and my time and energy as a consumer of media.

(please note: i am just citing the first example that comes to my mind. i am sure plenty more exist out there. i don't mean to pick on ms. knowles in particular, hers is just one example that i recall rather vividly...)

SOAW protest

2004-11-19T21:01:00.000-05:00

so, i learn today that my friend ed is going to georgia to protest the school of the americas...
pretty cool... wish i knew earlier so i could have gone along.

so, in the spirit of compensation, here's the link to the SOAW site:
---> http://www.soaw.org/new/index.php

check it out... and then be scared!

peace,
ogbuefi stephi

november 26th is "buy nothing day!" hooray!

2004-11-17T22:31:00.000-05:00

ever wonder where all that crap you buy goes when you're done with it?
ever ponder the extent of your ecological footprint?
are you simply tired of this sick, materialistic world in which we live and want to do something about it?
well, GOOD. join the rest of us!

pledge to buy nothing on november 26th and refuse to contribute to the horrid cycle of consumption and mass production that forms the disintegrating foundation of the american capitalist economy!

even if it is only for one day, it makes a difference in the long run if people everywhere could just realize how much waste and want plagues the american lifestyle. only after we realize the problem can we do something to fix it!

so please visit this site ---> http://www.adbusters.org/metas/eco/bnd/
learn more about "buy nothing day" and what you can do to end the vicious cycle!

*thanks to James, whose blog (http://ctrlaltdestroy.blogspot.com/) introduced me to the concept. thanks!*

fallujah fallout (one snide comment deserves another...)

2004-11-17T01:15:00.000-05:00

the other day, a friend pointed me to a site which makes a point of showing pictures from fallujah.
(if you are not weak of stomach or heart, please visit http://fallujapictures.blogspot.com/ to see what horrible crimes against humanity bush has ordered upon both iraqi citizens and u.s. soldiers and troops)
well, i went to take a look, and was moved to comment as follows:

Ogbuefi Stephi said...
i wonder if people who believe in the "moral right" would still have voted for bush if they could see these pictures. i hate to think that our nation gave him a "mandate" (eventhough 51% doesn't really constitute a mandate) to defend the moral order...it's ridiculous that most of the people who voted for bush are probably against abortion, and think of it as "immoral" to kill an unborn child... what about the thousands upon thousands of innocent iraqi children who were just so unlucky to be born as iraqi citizens?
God can't be on both sides... so why does bush think He's with us?

well, upon checking back at the site later, i discovered this response:

Anonymous said...
Ogbuefi, we who believe in a "moral right" are not so lacking in testicles as you are. These pictures are worthless, and change no opinions. We have a job to do and this is the price and we are willing to pay. The Iraqis are equally willing, I suppose everyone has forgotten that an equal number of Iraqi soldiers are fighting for their country, and I also suppose everyone seems to forget that the enemy in Fallujah are not Iraqi, but foreigners, and the Sunnis there have thrown down their arms and blamed these foreigners for the invasion of their city.

hmm... interesting that this particular person found it necessary to hide behind his/her anonymity, refusing to provide further information by which i could contact him/her directly to further contest his/her opinion.
thus, in the hope that this person will actually find the nerve and interest necessary to visit my site (which i honestly hope they do):
first, how can a feeling human being who claims to subscribe to the "moral right" actually say that these pictures of suffering and destruction are "worthless and change no opinions?" i find that to be incredibly harsh, unfeeling, immoral and, quite frankly, grotesquely disgusting!
even more revolting, however, is your concept of moral "duty" (which, by the way, is quite possibly the biggest crock of aggrandized b.s. i have ever heard). when was the u.s. appointed the "bringer of democracy and all that is good?" and, perhaps more importantly, by whom? because a nation with a "moral mandate" that they created themselves for the sake of personal interests is not a responsible nation, and certainly not a moral one. so when you say that "we have a job to do" i think you fail to understand that this "job" serves no moral purpose. you say this as if we are raining enlightenment and knowledge upon the ignorant masses in iraq, that, for some reason, you feel they need to be liberated from their chosen ignorance and that we (of all people) are the ones to do this for them. as if by killing all their children and destroying families and making them hate us (and want to kill us and hurt us more), we will bring them out of the darkness, towards the light, so that they will finally embrace us in the end and call us "savior." please, have you no sense?
i'm not saying we shouldn't be helping our fellow human beings. but there are certainly more obvious forms of philanthropy. how will destroying their way of life improve anything for the population of iraqi citizens whose lives and realities are being atomized by american ordinance and ascendence? and how ironic that our current nation is bringing the joys of "democracy" and "freedom" from dictatorial rule to a people who never asked for our assistance or ever expressed the need for it. i mean, 49% of our own nations' people didn't even want bush as our leader. how are the iraqi's going to feel any different?
oh, and as for the sophomoric "testicles" comment: how insipidly clever of "anonymous." as this observation came from someone too timid to contest my opinion directly, someone too (pardon my own lack of authenticity in the following remark) scared to actually go to iraq and fight, it really does speak badly of me. how dreadfully "lacking in testicles" i must truly be then! touche! well, at least i am not too afraid to live in a world where individual will and free choice are actual realities. God forbid if people determine their own lifestyles and beliefs. how scary it must be for some people to realize the lack of "moral order" that must exist in these heathen parts of the doomed and corrupted earth. why, "anonymous" was right. i am scared! i am absolutely a-quiver with fear at the realization that our world is completely lacking in moral direction and moral order.
but what is even scarier than this?
...people who force enlightenment on the unwilling...
knowledge, like ignorance, must be something we choose for ourselves, and not for others.

how about some fun stuff for a change? sound good?... yeeeeah

2004-11-10T17:06:00.000-05:00

i thought some nice music might be a nice change from the depressing political discussion of late. so, in hopes of cheering myself (and others) up and creating a creative diversion, i present you with some new, enticing music!

now what's better? ... nothing!

so, i thought i'd go with some damien rice for starters. i love his music! no... i heart it! so here's a link or two. hope you heart it, too!

also try www.damienrice.com

here's to amazing music and its therapeutic faculties.
~ogbuefi stephi

from ohio: we're sorry!

2004-11-10T01:27:00.000-05:00

to the rest of our fractured nation and the fearful, helpless, watching world... the responsible and concerned citizens of ohio are truly apologetic for the stupidity, ignorance, blindness and irresponsibility of the rest of our state. we truly let you down.

[insert intellectual frown and shotgun blast to conceptualized thoughts of america]
~ohioan and ex-kentuckian

p.s. an additional apologetic extension to all the disenfranchised members of the homosexual population. both of my "home" states failed you miserably. welcome to the oppression of the newly formed "jesus-states!"

oooh... for more apologies from people all around the nation, go to
---> www.sorryeverybody.com!!!
perhaps this will make some people realize the affect our horrible nation has on the rest of the world...
here's hopin'!

some encouraging words from michael moore...

2004-11-10T01:15:00.000-05:00

for those of you who actually respect michael moore and his word and opinion, here are some encouraging words from the man... i don't personally find any gratification or solace in them, as i believe america's youth are still largely misinformed, uneducated, apathetic and lazy, but i suppose others may find some comfort in knowing that the blame doesn't lie entirely with them. for those with an external locus of control, here you are:

The Kids Are Alright>>>
November 7th, 2004
Friends,
If there was one group who really came through on Tuesday, it was the young people of America. Their turnout was historic and record-setting. And few in the media are willing to report this fact. Unlike 2000 when Gore and Bush almost evenly split the youth vote (Gore:>48%, Bush: 46%), this year Kerry won the youth vote in a LANDSLIDE, getting a full ten points more than Bush (Kerry: 54%, Bush: 44%). Young people were the ONLY age group that voted for Kerry. In every other>age group (30-39, 40-49, 50-59, etc.), the majority voted for Bush. In my state of Michigan, observers noted that it was the record youth vote that helped to put Kerry over the top in the state (AP: "Young Voters Played Big Role in Kerry's Michigan Victory"). Contrary to all predictions and to tradition, MORE young adults (18-29) voted in last week's election than in any other since 18-year-olds were given the right to vote in 1972. It was the first time that a MAJORITY of all young adults came out to the polls: 51.6%. Young adult turnout was UP more than 9% higher than the 2000 election ("Big Voter Turnout Seen Among Young People"). 4.7 million MORE young adults voted in this election than in the last one. All these numbers are likely to go up when the millions of provisional ballots (and absentee ballots) are counted later this week (it is believed that young people were among the hardest hit in being forced to vote provisionally and students away at college make up a large bulk of the absentee ballots). Rock the Vote and MTV's "Choose or Lose" had set the seemingly unattainable goal of getting 20 million young people out to vote. In the end, nearly 21 million youth voters cast their ballots last Tuesday -- A RECORD. From the beginning, I believed that young adults and "slackers" would rise up in this election. As we began our slacker tour in Syracuse's football stadium on September 20, we could tell that this election would be like no other. It was no longer uncool to talk politics like it was five or ten years ago. Now, you were considered a loser if you didn't know what was going on in the world. After speaking to the 10,000 gathered in Syracuse, we went on to hold rallies in 63 cities, mostly on campuses. Every night the events were packed, with anywhere from 5,000 to 15,000 people showing up. We registered thousands to vote and got tens of thousands more to sign up to volunteer with Move On, ACT, the College Dems and other groups like Vote Mob and the League of Pissed Off Voters. We reached perhaps a half-million people in person and millions more on local TV and radio in those 63 cities (all but three of them in swing states). To be honest, this tour was a killer and not the easiest thing to do for a guy who isn't 18-29. Two (sometimes three) cities a day for over a month, crisscrossing the country, is enough to make you want to sleep for a year. But I was deeply inspired by what I saw. The level of dedication and commitment amongst everyday, average citizens was overwhelming. Each night from the stage I could see it in people's eyes that they were not going to give up -- and they, too, would not rest until Bush was removed from the White House. In every town, this movement was being fueled and often led by young people. I don't ever want to hear another adult talk about how apathetic the youth are or how they don't have "it" in them. What you are about to see in the coming months is going to shock you. These kids aren't going away. They have a resilience that cannot be snuffed out by older people's whining and moaning about the state of America. THEIR America has yet to be formed as they see it, and this one setback is not going to stop them. Witness the students at Boulder High School in Boulder, Colorado on Thursday, two days after the election. These kids can't even vote yet but that was not going to get in their way of expressing their outrage over what we adults had just done. The high school students took over the school by staging a sit-in and would not leave the building. They stayed there all Thursday night. They told the media that they were protesting the election results and putting Bush on notice that there was no way they were going to allow the draft to come back. It was the most uplifting moment of the week. In the day after the election, the pundits were spewing their hot air about how the youth vote didn't matter this year. I wonder, even though they have the same facts available to them as I do -- the ones I've cited above -- do they just chose to ignore them because it doesn't fit into their tired old routine they call "conventional wisdom." I guess it is easier to simply repeat the same broken down clichés than it is to find out what the truth really is. And it's even more important to kill what smells like teen spirit to them. God forbid if young people ever realized their true power and used it. Maybe what young adults need to continue to do is keep creating their own new media and news sources on the Internet and through other new technologies. Just bypass the old farts on Fox and CNN and all the rest. One thing's for sure -- by never challenging this president on his lies that sent our young off to war, they have proven which side they are on and it isn't on the side of the young or the future.
Congratulations, 18 to 29-year-olds -- you rocked.
Yours,
Michael Moore www.michaelmoore.com
MMFlint@aol.com (if full, try mike@michaelmoore.com)

and now back to politically significant things...

2004-11-08T01:56:00.000-05:00

well, that was a nice (though brief) hiatus from political discourse.

now, for more rantings and complaints, reasons why bush should have lost, kerry should have won, why the world should be different... you know, the good stuff.

starting with this: exit polls conspiracy... bush and jeb are in cahoots!
read---> http://www.commondreams.org/headlines04/1106-30.htm

back to the dreary world of post-election2004...

stop using petroleum!... and go see i heart huckabee's!

2004-11-07T20:11:00.000-05:00

after all the depressing election-related stuff of my recent posts, i decided it would be best to move on to happier things. i'm not saying political discourse isn't my cup o' tea and whatnot, i'm just saying that there comes a time when you can't deal with the sheer disappointment and anger it brings. political issues are still important, mind you, and i still firmly believe that people in our age group need to be more politically aware. but for the moment, on to lighter topics:

... i went to see the new movie from david o. russel today, and i must say, i heart huckabee's is one of the wittiest "existential" films i have seen in a long time!
it was definitely more original and thought-provoking than the disappointing similar movie of late, eternal sunshine of the spotless mind. yet, it was entirely possible to ignore all the existential drivel and simply enjoy the clever banter.

so, in the spirit of huckabee's, i would like to share some awesome, thought-provoking, spiritually stimulating links that may help in the comunication of the beauty and o-haian stirring that is embodied in this remarkable film!

---> http://www.apple.com/trailers/fox_searchlight/i_heart_huckabees/
---> http://tommycorn.blogspot.com/
---> http://www.huckabees.com/
---> http://www.jaffeandjaffe.com/

enjoy!

thought of the day

2004-11-04T22:45:00.000-05:00

"Naturally, the common people don't want war: neither in Russia, nor inEngland, nor for that matter in Germany. That is understood. But, after all, it is the leaders of the country who determine the policy and it is always a simple matter to drag the people along, whether it is a democracy, or a fascist dictatorship, or a parliament, or a communist dictatorship. Voice or no voice, the people can always be brought to the bidding of the leaders. That is easy. All you have to do is tell them they are being attacked, and denounce the peacemakers for lack of patriotism and exposing the country to danger. It works the same in any country."
-Nazi Reichmarshall Hermann Goering, at the Nuremberg Trials

scary, no?
ponder that for a while whilst you cower in fear of the future and all it has to offer.

poor voter turnout for 18-29 age group... a catastrophic neglect of individual duty and right

2004-11-03T20:38:00.000-05:00

in response to "chels"'s comment to my earlier post:
yes, our age group of 18-29 year olds only had a voter turnout of a disappointing 17%, no higher than the last election. voter turnout in general across the nation increased by (i think) a couple million people, yet our particular age group did not show any signs of improvement (this is despite movements such as votemob, musicforamerica.org and p.diddy's "vote or die" campaign)
if i may: WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE?! can you not see, can you not understand?! this election was possibly the most important one of our lifetime, yet people were still too lazy or apathetic to vote! i cannot express enough my extreme disappointment, anger, frustration at the hundreds of thousands of youth in america who take their rights and privileges as citizens for granted.
this election decided more than our nation's president: it will affect the quality of life and the extent to which freedom, democracy and the "american ideal" are defended. do you not see that this affects you?
what will happen when four years from now, we all graduate from college and go on to pursue jobs and careers? we will have nowhere to go, nowhere to work because the job market is so terrible! and healthcare? you can forget about that. prepare to work until you are 80 and fighting for breath, because the current government isn't going to help you there either. oh, and for you aspiring teachers out there (including myself): prepare for a world of hurt. "no child left behind" is a crock of fesces ready to bite us all in the buttocks. we are all screwed because of this election!
youth of the nation, this is a call to action! it may be too late to change the outcome of this last election, but we must learn, remember and prepare. come election 2008, guns blaring, megaphones ready. the youth must hit to the streets and raise awareness, must fight in the defense of freedom and democracy, in defense of "america," not against terrorists, but against the indecision, apathy, ignorance and laziness of our own people, our own generation. we must all join in the fight to save our nation, to protect our interests, to protect our lives as citizens. we must save ourselves from the system. renew, rebuild, and change for the better. this is our only hope. the future belongs to us if we could only find the courage and strength to defend it!

please pledge to vote in election 2008 here! (no matter which party affiliation) it is not too early to make a difference. with the future in mind, all is possible!

"america has spoken"

2004-11-03T19:21:00.000-05:00

-george w. bush, approx. 2 p.m. est, november 3rd, 2004

it pains me it disgusts me it disturbs me.
it disquiets me it hurts me it insults me.
i cry i scream i shut my eyes in fear.
i yell i scream i feel my pain.
a waste a disgrace a travesty.
i stumble i clench my fists i march forth.
in the dark in the streets in the classrooms of this nation, i hear the disbelieving wails of a confused and disconnected public.
i feel our nation splitting from its innards out...
and i brace for the jolting backlash
as she throws her head back
gushing bleeding screaming forth

i do not know what will become of this nation
i am flabbergasted by the incredibly disappointing events of the last 12 hours
where do we go from here as a nation?
the unity of america and the upholding of its ideals are at stake.
the concept and ideation of america must now stand up to the challenges and voices and outcries of the public.
it must answer.

...stay tuned... issues to be addressed in a forthcoming post:

i will talk about my efforts at over-the-rhine in cincinatti, ohio, and the wonderful feelings of democracy and empowerment i felt while working for 12 hours continuously fighting to get people to the polls
lower class vs. middle/upper class concept and practice of democracy
anger, resentment, disappointment regarding low voter turnout for 18-29 age group (what is wrong with people!)
rage against the ignorant masses and the dominant moral social order that is coming to oppress us (government and enforced social codes/religion? bad social/political cocktail!)
what might happen to our nation and world relations
i will try to make sense of the disappointing election results (how could that many people vote bush? ignorant, illiterate, misinformed or misguided? never have i been more scared for the general american public)
kerry's concession speech (how disappointing! on the one hand, very graceful and dignified bow-out. well played, but it felt like betrayal. i, like thousands of others, devoted weeks, months, even years to kerry's campaign and the effort to get bush out of office. to abandon it without a fight, to surrender to bush... that was worse than the actual reality of bush's gaining 274 electoral votes. i feel neglected, betrayed, cheated.)
WTF?! 274 electoral votes?! bush became the first prez since his father in 1988 to win more than 50% of the electoral college (according to www.cnn.com) how? i believe it's a bush dynasty conspiracy, which brings me to...
CONSPIRACY THEORIES (i will pose questions of the mysterious bush presidencies, both elections, 9/11, the war on terror, etc.)

please come back to see about these and other opinions.

my experience in the democratic trenches

2004-11-03T02:26:00.000-05:00

i marvelled at the beauty and empowerment of the voting process and democracy in society. i imagined our founding fathers establishing a society that they hoped would resemble something similar to what i witnessed today: people of diverse ethnicities, classes and religious and political affiliations trekking (in the rain no less!) to the polls to exercise their rights and duties as citizens. you know you have a successful democracy when the individual takes his/her role as a citizen seriously.

but now, i feel that the hope of unification and change and all the faith i had in the american system, in my vision and image of democracy and freedom in america has been tainted, spoiled, soiled, ravaged, trampled upon, torn apart, ripped away from me. i no longer find it possible to imagine a peaceful unification of the nation. i foresee mass distrust, marginalization, alienation, disenfranchisement of the nation's people. i can imagine no positive outcome of another four years of the current regime.

(recovered from a lost past post)

what... the... F*@#%?!

2004-11-03T01:40:00.000-05:00

what has happened to america? have we all been brainwashed and beaten silly and stupid? how is it possible that the american public could re-elect george bush?! how is it that bush even got close to kerry? kerry should have crushed bush in the election! there should have been no doubt and no contest!
what. the. F*$#%!!!!!!!
i simply don't understand. how can intelligent, moral people vote for that war-monger?
after devoting so much energy and time to progressive voting efforts, i am sorely, painfully disappointed in the current state of our nation.
as i walked the streets of downtown cincinatti, ohio today and escorted voters to the polls, i marvelled at the beauty and empowerment of the voting process and democracy in society. i imagined our founding fathers establishing a society that they hoped would resemble something similar to what i witnessed today: people of diverse ethnicities, classes and religious and political affiliations trekking (in the rain no less!) to the polls to exercise their rights and duties as citizens. you know you have a successful democracy when the individual takes his/her role as a citizen seriously.
but now, i feel that the hope of unification and change and all the faith i had in the american system, in my vision and image of democracy and freedom in america has been tainted, spoiled, soiled, ravaged, trampled upon, torn apart, ripped away from me. i no longer find it possible to imagine a peaceful unification of the nation. i foresee mass distrust, marginalization, alienation, disenfranchisement of the nation's people. i can imagine no positive outcome of another four years of the current regime.
with all that has been done, all that individuals every where have dedicated and put forth, it is unfathomable that this nightmare has become our living reality.
what does the future hold? where can we possibly go from here? when will the voices of an oppressed nation surge forth? when will we realize the fruits of positive, progressive change? when did the future first start to look so grim? what will it finally take for the people of america to wake up and jolt ourselves out of this travesty of democracy?!

get out and VOTE this coming tuesday!

2004-10-30T02:06:00.000-04:00

VOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOTE!
it's getting close to election day, and i just wanted to ask you all to please VOTE! it is so important that you do, no matter who you choose (although i feel compelled at this moment to interject my own personal opinion, which you may choose to disregard or devalue as you wish: VOTE FOR KERRY! do NOT vote for nader...kerry may seem like the lesser of two evils, but he is better than W nonetheless. BUSH MUST NOT BE RE-ELECTED!)
anyway, to increase political awareness, i suggest checking out MfA's website at
---> www.musicforamerica.org!!!
read, get informed, get involved!

if you don't vote, don't complain.

aaaaaaaaaack!

2004-10-29T04:59:00.000-04:00

IT'S FIVE IN THE FREAKIN' A.M. AND I AM STILL AWAKE AND WRITING A PAPER! WHY?!
BECAUSE I AM DISENFRANCHISED AND SAD.
AND SCHOOL BLOWS!
ENJOY THE HAPPY DAYS, THEY WILL NOT LAST FOREVER.

just one of those days...

2004-10-27T17:04:00.000-04:00

today's one of those days that makes me sad and bored and fidgety because i feel like i could be better utilizing my time, but there is nothing to which i may devote my time and energy. it's one of those days that makes me feel purposeless and useless and...
i wish i had something better, something more important to do... i write papers for honors classes and read dull books about paralyzingly boring subject matter. how is my knowledge of the symbolic significance of hair going to benefit society? can i use this information to help myself and others? mmm... no. it only makes me self-conscious about my own haircut and very critical about other people's hairstyles. so, actually what it's done is made me into an unhappy, overanalytical hairstyle maven with no direction in life.
imagine all the things i could be doing instead! i could be hiking in alaska, working for green peace, feeding hungry children in africa, reading to the illiterate of america, fighting a war against the tobacco companies...
at what point did my life start losing its excitement and potential? and why am i so darned disheartened?

well... off to write more pretentious drivel about something "intellectual."

the tantalizing excitement of the possibility of change in america... and petrifying fear of the unthinkable

2004-10-27T14:01:00.000-04:00

i was thinking the other day about all this election day hooplah that's been circulating through the media, and it hit me: in less than a week now, america could possibly have a new president!
i bid farewell to my parents when they came to visit me, and i told them, "the next time i see you, we may possibly have a new president in office." and that just tickled me.
it's amazing how radically different our world could be within a few months, if, in fact, bush is not re-elected (oh, how wonderful a day that would be!) but what if that doesn't happen? i look around my dorm and see more and more bush-cheney signs go up every day. and it absolutely terrifies me! what if he were re-elected? another four years? i cannot even comprehend the disgust and disbelief...

pondering the value of "higher education"...

2004-10-23T01:28:00.000-04:00

The last week was quite a doozie. We had midterms here at Miami, so I was scrambling to write several "academic" papers, from a Marxist analysis of the Matrix Revolutions (which, by the way, is perhaps one of the silliest movies ever made), to an interpretive rewrite of a "journey to college" fairy tale in a surrealist style. Admittedly, I did enjoy adopting the Marxist perspective for the time it took to write the paper, and I do enjoy playing with words and images as I did with the surrealist piece, but if I am required to write one more paper on symbolism and metaphor and their contribution to the cultural significance of a work, my brain will implode. The same sentiment applies to all the Civil Rights Movement literature my professors have been proffering me since classes began. It's sad that books such as Invisible Man or Meridian cannot be enjoyed and appreciated as American literature and must instead be labeled as results of the Civil Rights Movement. It's not that I don't appreciate everything about that movement (I mean heck, how politically incorrect would it be for someone to just completely insult the Civil Rights Movement and decry its meaning and purpose in American history? One such buffoon would surely be hung high from the rafters after being declared a racist, social deviant and villain). I just feel that too much depends upon my forced enjoyment and appreciation of these "significant" works of literature. I feel pressured, coerced, obligated to appreciate these novels instead of being truly persuaded or convinced through the abilities and faculties of the writer. Isn't there more to a work of fiction than its social implications, however "significant" they may be? I don't care how "socially significant" a piece of literature is if it bores the brains out of me. Give me well-written drivel any day. If a book says nothing, but does so in an amusing fashion, then wonderful! And if an author can communicate profound truths and philosophical observations and even bring light to social issues with a hint of humor and wit, then fantastic! Social activism should not be a crutch for bad writing.
But even as I write this, I feel somewhat bad. Is this hedonistic of me? Am I being too critical? I suppose academic writing should maintain a certain level of respectability, and perhaps this is best achieved by refraining from glib comments and sarcasm. But Nietzsche accomplished a wonderfully analytical, nuanced philosophy while maintaining an entertaining, sardonic tone...
I don't know where I am going with this... I suppose what I am trying to say is that I enjoy my classes, but feel a little disappointed at the level of predictability my professors have displayed thus far. I read these "socially significant" novels and feel that I have already been inundated with the same fiery ideas in high school. What of the other cultures in the world? Surely something besides the African-American fight for freedom in America deserves attention and discussion from the scholar?
As every day passes in my disenchanted-college-student existence, I wonder if there is a way I could better utilize my time. Become a musician? tutor? mentor? garbage person? mime? or perhaps a bum? ah... the possibilities.
Well, I hope my studies improve and that I may begin to discover new facets of enjoyment and appreciation in this intellectual adventure known as "higher education."

jolted: a sudden tragedy

2004-10-21T16:37:00.000-04:00

something incomprehensible happened last week:
my orchestra teacher, Mr. Hensley, passed away.
i had known he was ill. he had lung replacement surgery last year, and he was hospitalized several times in the subsequent months. but i had assumed he was recovering amply.
my friend alan called me last week (during midterms) and he sounded distraught. now, alan isn't the most bubbly of individuals, but i did feel a little alarmed to hear his message. when i called him back, however, i never would have expected to hear the words he spoke to me.
i have always been afraid of death. i am not personally worried about my own death. i'm not saying i welcome the idea. i hate thinking about how sad my family and friends would be if (God forbid) i did pass away. i am just saying that if my time came, i would like to think that i would not be afriad for myself. i would hate to have to leave this world with that fear lingering over me. i'd like to think that when i do pass away, i could go in peace, with only thoughts of my family and friends in my head.
i like to think that when everyone dies, they have a moment of time... perhaps only a second or two, but it would be a lifetime playing over in their head. it would be a moment of reflection, a pause. a standstill. a slowing of time and consciousness, a suspended transition from one world to the next.
i'd like to think we are all given this time between wakefulness and eternal sleep, this "pause," to reflect and prepare for the journey ahead.

...perhaps it's similar to birth: a sudden breakthrough into a new world, one we barely understand and comprehend, but we know we are in for an adventure and journey. we must only be grateful for the opportunities we are given and the steps we must tread ahead and in the future.

i don't know how much sense all this makes, but i like to hope that maybe, perhaps, my dear teacher, Mr. Hensley, had a moment such as this.
and i know that this is a terrible way to say this, and a terrible way to do it, but i guess this is just my way of expressing the impact of his death in my life. i never really experienced the death of someone close to me before. i mean, death is always addressed in movies, tv, radio, literature, etc., but who really understands how it really feels to lose something or someone until something like this happens?
what i am trying to say (and failing miserably at doing) is that i still can't comprehend this in my mind. death has taken away this relationship, and i still can't fathom it, because it still seems so alien, so strange, so separate from me. i can't believe it, and yet i want to, i need to understand this feeling in my life. i know i am changed, both emotionally and mentally. but i don't know how yet.
i think i cannot think of anything the same again. i am just too consumed with thoughts of loss and the nature of death and life.

more on this later... i need to think...

am i online?

2004-10-07T23:39:00.000-04:00

whoa, dude. this actually works. i can't believe i got my own blog on the internet.
this is totally crazy! the idea of the "saturated self" is taking over! aack!